4 Things My Childhood Screwed Up.

I thought a short list might suit me today. So, here we go!

This week's plan to do list

This week’s plan to do list (Photo credit: the green gables)

Things my childhood ill-prepared me for:

1) Relationships do NOT happen like Disney movies.

Not every woman wants to be treated like a damsel-in-distress every minute of every day. They do not need you acting upon what you think is best for them all the time. They don’t appreciate the assumption that your job is to fix all their problems. They do not sing their feelings. Most importantly, it does not always end well. Some relationships just aren’t meant to be. It doesn’t always matter who loved whom how much. Sometimes it just doesn’t work.

2) School is nothing like work.

About the only thing that school and work share, is the fact that you don’t get to choose when to go, when to leave, or what you’re doing. The rest of it isn’t even remotely the same. School is very structured and task-oriented. Work isn’t usually like that. You usually have 6 things to do, all of which needed done yesterday, and no one is ever happy with the result. Nearly every project is like a group project where you have to do all the work. If they graded work, we would all fail.

3) No one has the same group of friends forever.

I blame sitcoms. Especially the ones aimed at young adults. They told me I would have 3-5 friends and we would be the best group ever, all the time. Not so. People grow up, things change and everyone goes their separate ways eventually. There’s no reunion show where everyone meets up and it’s just like old times.

4) Not every situation requires a hero.

Every book, Movie, TV show and Video Game told me that I was the hero. I was good at everything. It was my job to save the world! Sometimes, it’s just your job to clean the fuzzy shit out of the brush bar on the vacuum. Sometimes, it’s your job to dump spoiled milk down the drain. Sometimes you spill hot water on your bare feet and burn them. Not every situation is glamorous, and you can’t always be a hero.

I’m sure there are more things but I realized reading a different list this morning that my childhood lied to me a lot.

Anything your childhood didn’t adequately prepare you for?