4 Things My Childhood Screwed Up.

I thought a short list might suit me today. So, here we go!

This week's plan to do list

This week’s plan to do list (Photo credit: the green gables)

Things my childhood ill-prepared me for:

1) Relationships do NOT happen like Disney movies.

Not every woman wants to be treated like a damsel-in-distress every minute of every day. They do not need you acting upon what you think is best for them all the time. They don’t appreciate the assumption that your job is to fix all their problems. They do not sing their feelings. Most importantly, it does not always end well. Some relationships just aren’t meant to be. It doesn’t always matter who loved whom how much. Sometimes it just doesn’t work.

2) School is nothing like work.

About the only thing that school and work share, is the fact that you don’t get to choose when to go, when to leave, or what you’re doing. The rest of it isn’t even remotely the same. School is very structured and task-oriented. Work isn’t usually like that. You usually have 6 things to do, all of which needed done yesterday, and no one is ever happy with the result. Nearly every project is like a group project where you have to do all the work. If they graded work, we would all fail.

3) No one has the same group of friends forever.

I blame sitcoms. Especially the ones aimed at young adults. They told me I would have 3-5 friends and we would be the best group ever, all the time. Not so. People grow up, things change and everyone goes their separate ways eventually. There’s no reunion show where everyone meets up and it’s just like old times.

4) Not every situation requires a hero.

Every book, Movie, TV show and Video Game told me that I was the hero. I was good at everything. It was my job to save the world! Sometimes, it’s just your job to clean the fuzzy shit out of the brush bar on the vacuum. Sometimes, it’s your job to dump spoiled milk down the drain. Sometimes you spill hot water on your bare feet and burn them. Not every situation is glamorous, and you can’t always be a hero.

I’m sure there are more things but I realized reading a different list this morning that my childhood lied to me a lot.

Anything your childhood didn’t adequately prepare you for?


6 thoughts on “4 Things My Childhood Screwed Up.

  1. Problem people. I never really took movies at face value (other than Bambi, but I think I’ll be excused for that one, right?) or even “life lessons” at school, but it was nice to believe that if you couldn’t deal with someone then:
    a. Well, duh, they’re evil.
    b. They’ll come around. It’s just a misunderstading and there’ll be a big party when they do.
    I’ve found that neither option is likely, but I’m still holding out on option two anyways ^^

    • Very true! Thing was, it happened in every show. So when it didn’t happen in real life, I got confused. I was thinking that if every television depiction of middle school was the same, how could they be wrong?

    • It’s weird how there can be such a disconnect from child through adulthood. It takes so long to go from child to preteen to teenager to young adult. Your perception can change so drastically so quickly, and it’s only thrown into even starker contrast the older you get.

  2. There SHOULD be a small disconnect. I mean, as a child, you shouldn’t have to worry about any adult things. I’m all for prolonging childhood. It’s the Millennials that have made the transition harder. “We” (I’m not sure if I want to group myself into this) feel entitled, and we delay entering adulthood by moving back in with parents upon graduating from college, or pursuing higher degrees.

    And then there’s that weird thing where we all look forward to 18 so that we can do adult things, but they aren’t truly adult things if you’re going to college. The only people who truly turn into an adult at 18 are the ones that graduate high school and join the workforce straight off the bat.

    Here’s the other thing–I believe that jobs that do not require degrees are probably a lot less stress and a lot less obnoxious. You go, you do, you come home, you forget about it until 8am the next day. Or whatever shift you work.

    On your other points: Who would want a relationship to happen Disney-style? Sure as eff not me. Minus the rich princess thing. That’d be okay.

    In terms of the same group of friends–while you do form bonds that last forever with people, you just may not see them on a regular basis. The true friends are the ones you can talk to with tons of time in between and it feels like you never quit talking.

    Heroes. Heroes are only required when there is something bad looming. Sure, there’s always something bad looming, but you’re right. We need to learn to appreciate the times when there isn’t evil.

    • You’re right. I don’t necessarily think that’s the way things SHOULD be, just that things didn’t really turn out like I expected.
      Kids shouldn’t have to be adults, and adults shouldn’t be treated like kids. It happens sometimes that kids have to grow up too fast, and that’s really unfortunate. I know it happens a lot that adults get treated like kids and I bet that’s a larger problem than we realize.
      There’s definitely a tendency to assume that everything is going to end up like the models you have growing up. The problem is that when those models homogenize your expectations, it’s an even bigger shock when they don’t come out that way.

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